


Spank Bank

by astartelydianna



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-05
Updated: 2016-02-11
Packaged: 2018-04-19 05:46:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4734806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astartelydianna/pseuds/astartelydianna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which the Avengers are walking talking eye candy and Steve learns the meaning of spank bank</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Spank Bank Part 1

It was a common thing for Darcy to spend her days in Tony Stark’s lab now. It was her life. Insane right?

Thing was after the fall of Shield Tony Stark took in the Avengers at the tower. This led to Thor insisting that Jane should live with him in his room at the tower and Jane didn’t want to leave Darcy out. Of course the reality was that there were plenty of other science type people that were better at assisting Jane in the lab, basically her and Erik worked together and Darcy got reassigned.

Queue an offer from Pepper Potts.

For some reason within the first few weeks at Stark tower, Pepper Potts decided that she would make an excellent handler for Tony Stark. She wasn’t afraid of him, she called bullshit and she took all his quirks in her stride, also her degree in political science made her a good liaison between Pepper and Tony when it came to the business of Stark Industries. The shareholders of Stark Industries hadn’t been happy about Stark signing control over to his assistant, which meant that he had to still hold a position at the company. He was now the Head of Research and development, a title that was mainly a name, as he avoided as much work as he could but having his name somewhere important kept the investors happy.

The best thing was that Tony didn’t care how blunt and honest she was at work, he didn’t care if she swore and he didn’t care if she didn’t dress smart because he spent all his time in grubby t-shirt and jeans in his workshop anyway. It was a pretty sweet deal as far as jobs went.

~*~*~*~

Darcy clutched her aching sides, as she laughed at the story Tony told her, about an incident in a hotel in Boston after a publicity event. Their laughter trailed off as Steve entered the room.

"Hey Capsicle." Tony greeted. “Let me guess, serious business?”

“Hey Stevie boy, come to visit the fun people?” Darcy grinned, hopping down from the work bench she was perched on.

"What's all the laughing about?" He asked.

"Nothing your innocent ears want to hear." Tony replied, reaching up and patting his shoulder patronizingly.

"Pfft, innocent? There's is no way Captain America is a virgin!" she snorted.

"Thank you." Steve said surprisingly loudly. 

"Um I'm sorry, have you not seen him try to talk to a girl he likes?" Tony countered, pointing at the blonde man.

"So? Sometimes I say stupid things or no things at all if I try to talk to someone I really like, does that make me a virgin?" she asked him, hands resting on her hips.

"Doubtful." Tony said, his eyes appraising her form.

"Precisely. Even dorks get laid." She said. Then she realized how that came out and looked at Steve apologetically. "I didn't mean you're a dork, I meant I'm a dork. See? I say stupid things too."

"If you had seen me before the serum, you'd definitely be calling me a dork Miss Lewis, don't worry about it." Steve grinned.

"So what is your evidence that Cap here has punched that V card?" Tony asked, leaning back against the worktop and crossing his arms over his chest thoughtfully.

"Hello, he was travelling Europe with a bunch of soldiers and show girls! I bet you those showgirls took great pleasure in teaching him a thing or two…of six." Darcy said. "I mean have you seen those biceps? If he didn’t get laid by at least one of them, then I really couldn't tell you whether I'm more disappointed in him or them."

"If biceps are the only important factor here..." Tony mused, flexing his arms.

"Yeah, you got guns Tony, not like Steve or Thor of course but you and Clint are still pretty cut." She laughed aloud. She picked up the paperwork she came in with and sighed with a smile on her face. "I'm surrounded by hotness, it’s like having a walking talking spank bank."

"If you want to throw on a low cut top and be in mine, I'll stop wearing a shirt at all." Tony offered with a smirk.

"Sorry Tony but Pepper is way more terrifying than the Hulk." Darcy replied patting his cheek. She moved closer to Steve and prodded at his arms. “Oh yeah…top of the spank bank.”

"What's a spank bank?" Steve asked, looking a little uncomfortable.

"I taught you how to use that Stark phone Steve, google it." Darcy grinned as she left the room.


	2. Objectifying Captain America (spank bank part 2) - Darcy/Steve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little one-shot that follows on from the last one. There will probably be more that follow at some point but I also have some other little one-shot ideas for other pairings.

Objectifying Captain America - Spank bank part 2

 

Pepper Potts laughed lightly at Steve's confused face as the woman left them. Darcy just snorted in an extremely unladylike fashion.

"He actually has no idea does he?" Darcy asked, turning to the older woman.

"He really doesn't. It's nice actually." She replied with a soft smile. 

"That woman was hitting on you." Darcy announced, putting Steve out of his misery.

"Really?" He asked, glancing towards the door that Alice from accounting had just disappeared through. 

"Yup, and not even in a subtle way either." Darcy told him, patting his knee. "Do you want me to point her out as we leave so you can go talk to her?"

"No!" He said quickly. "I think I'm fine."

A few moments later and Pepper had wrapped up their little meeting and dismissed them. Darcy and Steve left the conference room and headed to the kitchen for lunch. 

"So, you don't really date much do you?" She asked, as she started buttering slices of bread.

"Not really. It's probably for the best, I'm always busy." He shrugged. 

"You do know that it is a crime against humanity to look like that and not make use of it right?" She asked, not pausing her repetitive motions.

"I guess I'm still not used to it." He offered. He hadn't been entirely comfortable around Darcy's bluntness since he discovered the meaning of the term Spank Bank and Tony explained to him the she had been deadly serious about the reference. His brain couldn’t seem to be able to decide whether he was embarrassed or turned on, by the idea of the small loud woman he saw most days pleasuring herself while thinking about him…or any of the rest of the team for that matter.

"I get it, sort of, you weren't always like this but...it's been a while now..." She mused. 

"Yeah but for decades of it, I was in a coma." He pointed out. 

"OK, I'll give you that one." She agreed. By this point there was a rather large pile of sandwiches appearing and she handed a couple to Steve on a plate.

"Thanks, um, you didn't have to make me one, I'm right here." He told her.

"I'm making everyone else's anyway, it really is just easier to feed the lot of you to stop any arguments or hurt feelings…or starving scientists." She shrugged, cutting the sandwiches up and placing them all on a few platters. "But seriously, you should go on a date or two, get laid, see what life is like in this decade. I'm not saying turn into a manwhore, just go out and live a little, blow off some steam. Otherwise all this hard work is going to grind you down eventually."

"Maybe I don't want to date someone who just likes how I look now." He sighed. Darcy froze. She hadn't thought of that. "Peggy...she knew me from before, maybe she liked the new me better but she still at least liked something about me as the old me. I'm not going to find that with anyone else."

"No, you're not." She said honestly, coming and taking a seat at the table opposite him. "Which must suck...but that isn't our fault either. Us future girls can't really be blamed for being born decades too late. You don't want casual, you don't want a girl just after your Captain America body, that's fine...but you aren't going to know if someone likes your personality too unless you actually meet and talk to people. So, don't go out and party and get laid, I'll take that back. Do go out and maybe find a club or some other interest so that you can meet and get to know people, maybe you'll meet the perfect woman, maybe you'll just find some new friends."

"I guess I come off as sort of distant..." He admitted. 

"Not distant, serious." She replied. "You're polite and old school which makes you sound even more serious, which isn't a problem except...like you said, you're always busy. So you're all business and people don't always find that approachable. You're a nice guy Steve, you're smart, you're a gentleman, you're fun and you have a body second only to the God of Thunder! You are amazing but you have to let people see that if you’re ever going to meet someone who likes you for more than your body."

"Darcy...I don't..." He for once was not flushed and red faced, he was baffled. Here he was sulking that he didn't want people to only like Captain America, he wanted them to like Steve...and here Darcy was... She knew Steve, she liked Steve. Natasha knew Steve, Pepper and Jane and all the guys too, they all knew Steve. Darcy's words had him tied in knots because it was probably the nicest honest thing he had heard in a long time. She was blunt in a way that reminded him of Bucky and not the most ladylike of dames he'd met in this decade but...

"Dude, speak, because if I just broke Captain America then Pepper is so going to fire me." He heard her say. "Oh crap, people will like burn me at the stake or something." He let out a chuckle that grew to a full laugh as he looked at her worried expression. He dug around in his pocket for his wallet before fishing out an old photo and sliding it across the table to her.

"That's me." He told her. She watched as her eyes narrowed in concentration as she assessed the picture. 

"Except for the jaw...you're face is the same." She said. "Dude, did that super juice actually make you taller too?!"

"It changed nearly everything." He said. "Not so amazing, right?"

"I don't know, you were dorky obviously but not exactly bad looking. I mean not the kind of guy you'd really look twice at on the street or at the bar...but the sort of guy that if you were in a situation where you did look twice..." She trailed off and slid the picture towards him. "There's a reason they picked you Steve, that's the reason people should like you."

"You're pretty amazing yourself, Miss Lewis." He told her quietly.

"Does that mean I can still picture you naked?" She asked. "Because amazing or not, I am not above objectifying you to make myself feel better." When his head fell backwards at he let out a loud laugh, she knew her work was done for the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also if anyone has any random prompts or requests for avengers pairings I can try to fill them. These little drabbles and one-shots I'm doing are a little fun exercise to get me back in the swing of writing so that I can finish my Lokane story and then get working on my multi chapter Darcy/Bruce story I have planned.


	3. Objectifying Darcy (Spank Bank Part 3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy gets a taste of her own medicine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special shout out to Tracysgate who mentioned Natasha being in the spank bank too

Steve paused on his way into the gym and observed the familiar dark haired woman stood by the entrance. He hadn’t noticed her here before, not since nearly the entire team had been here having a mini tournament of types and Darcy and Jane had been among the group of spectators.

"What are you doing standing here?" He asked. Darcy jumped in surprise and turned to find herself a lot closer to him than she expected.

"I was looking for Tony but got distracted." She grinned.

"Is this more of your...objectifying?" He asked stiffly, glancing towards Clint, as the man swung himself up onto a beam.

"Yes and no. Yes, they are total eye candy but...also they are awesome." She replied. She gestured to Natasha, as she swung herself up onto the beam after Clint and in one swoop of her legs the archer was slammed to the ground. "I would kill to be able to do that..."

"You want to be an Avenger?" He asked in surprise. It wasn’t that people never wanted to be an Avenger because they did, he just wouldn’t have put Darcy among them.

"No, not an Avenger...just not helpless, you know what I mean?" She asked him. "I'm never going to be like that, never. I just...it'd be nice to be able to handle myself in an emergency, rather than cowering under a desk or in a closet waiting to be rescued. Plus...I want an ass like hers, have you seen it? Seriously, if working out would turn my ass into hers, I could put up with a lot of pain."

"Then stop complaining by the door and do something about it." A female voice interrupted. Darcy froze and looked up at Steve in horror at the fact she had been caught ogling the Black Widow’s ass. Darcy was all for eying up a woman who was so obviously hot as Natasha was and awesome to boot but she had been too terrified of ending up with a broken wrist, like that guy from the coffee shop, to be as open about it as she was with the men. 

"We don't bite." The Black Widow called again. Clint seemed to chuckle from somewhere in the room, which eased her fears a little as she turned to face the red head. 

"Sorry...I didn't mind to interrupt you." She apologised. Natasha was her hero, she was a woman who kicked butt, she was hot, she was smart and she even still had a sense of humour hidden in there. She was everything Darcy wished she was.

"You want to not be useless?" She asked, looking Darcy up and down, before pointing to the locker room. "Go change."

"I don't think anything that fits you is going to fit me." She blurted out. 

"They'll stretch." Natasha shrugged. Steve pushed Darcy in the direction of the changing room to get her moving, it worked, she found her legs turning traitor and walking straight towards the changing room. 

Natasha was right, the clothes stretched surprisingly well, still...as comfortable as she was with her curves most of the time, this was a whole different level of exposure. The black material clung to her thighs and hips, which were significantly less trim and toned than the Black Widow's. Her stomach, while not large, was certainly not the flat, hard plain of skin peeking out of the black tank top that Natasha had. Hers, while still mostly flat, was soft and wiggled a little when she moved. Then there was the girls, they practically burst up out of the top, as if they were rebelling against it. Black Widow she was not, so she felt decidedly uncomfortable when she returned to the main room to Clint's whistling.

“Looking good short stack.” He called. Steve did a double take but politely didn’t comment on the top that was at least two sizes too small, probably more. Needless to say she felt a lot less confident about herself than she usually did. Taking a deep breath she followed her mother’s advice, fake it.

"Come, warm up a little over there and then I'll teach you some basics." Natasha smirked. Darcy’s gaze from Clint and Steve one end of the room to the Russian stood in front of her.

"I'm not sure that-"

"You like what you see?" The red head asked bluntly. Darcy practically choked on her tongue in shock but found her eyes shifting from Clint's and Steve's exposed arms to Natasha's toned thighs anyway. "Then you get to return the favour."

"Wait, what?" She asked blankly. She found herself even more surprised when the older woman slid closer to her, turning her to face where Clint sat having a drink and Steve was already punching the bag hanging from the ceiling. She had the Black Widow pressed tightly against her back, this was a thought that was going to linger for weeks.

"You are very open and honest, I like that in people." Natasha said quietly behind her. "But you want him the most."

"Have you seen him, who wouldn't want to tap that?" She quipped.

"You want more than that." The red head murmured against her ear. "You can fool many people but you cannot fool me."

"OK, I want him." She admitted, seeing no point in lying. 

"Then you should give him every opportunity to look at you the way that you look at him." Natasha said. "I kissed him once for a cover, he's a very good kisser for someone who avoids dating."

"You're trying to torture me aren't you?" Darcy muttered. 

"No, but you might think that several more times if you want to train with me." 

"You were serious?" Darcy blurted, as the woman moved away.

"Of course, now go warm up." The woman shrugged.

"Already pretty hot." Darcy mumbled to herself, as she headed over to the corner to warm up. 

Little did Darcy know that Steve had definitely noticed Darcy in her borrowed workout clothes. At first he had tried not to stare, tried to think about something else, anything else. Then he remembered Darcy's total and honest admission of eying him up on a regular basis and just stared. He didn't feel comfortable objectifying women as a rule but Darcy had made it clear that she liked him as a person and that she was happy to objectify him. He liked Darcy as a person, so an argument could be made for him staring at her was simply returning the favour. When he saw Nat practically nuzzling at Darcy's neck from behind as she spoke he found himself growing rather uncomfortable in areas that had nothing to do with his brain. Steve had to admit to himself then that Darcy Lewis friend or not, had somehow become a part of his Spank Bank too.


	4. Operation Wingman

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special shout out to arysani for this one. This little fic is becoming less of a random oneshots that may or may not connect and more of a short chaptered story...oops...

In the last few weeks it had become blatantly obvious to Darcy, she wasn't good enough for Captain America. Not that she had issues with her self esteem, she just excepted reality. The reality was that for the average Joe she was a catch. 

Darcy knew that she wasn't bad looking, she wasn't perhaps as toned as she could be and she didn't dress up fancy very often but she certainly didn't look bad. She wasn't stupid, she wasn't a genius scientist but she had a degree and she was still pretty smart in the areas she applied herself. She was fun, what guy didn't want a girl that was fun? She liked sex, she was open about it and if men made leering comments about her chest, she had learned to just leer right back. It was difficult when her boobs were so obvious, they were usually the feature that every guy she dated paid attention to, it meant that she often attracted guys that were total losers. 

Encountering Shield and Stark Tower had been very eye opening for Darcy. Alright, there were still plenty of men and also women that talked to her chest area and several others that at least gave them a glance but there were also people that didn't! Obviously Tony looked and looked often, Clint also looked often enough and even Thor gave them the passing glance occasionally but Bruce and Steve, if they looked she never knew it. In fact she doubted they ever did because once when she had waved Bruce's tea right under his nose, he had ended up at eye line with the girls and leapt backwards so quickly, he spilt half the tea down his shirt while spluttering apologies. There were other scientists too, several of them didn't look and several of the Shield agents had such good poker faces, that their eyes didn't stray from her face, not visibly anyway. 

Her biggest new problem was Steve, he was gorgeous, beyond gorgeous and the nicest guy she had taken a liking to in ages and to put the cherry on top, he managed to speak to her face. She wouldn't have minded if he did take the occasional look at her boobs though, if she was honest. He didn't though. Steve was so polite, civilised and honourable it made her practically fall in love with him. She'd never admit to that though because he didn't seem interested in her. He liked her but he had shown no tiniest inclination of wanting anything more than friendship from her. In fact, frustratingly he seemed uncomfortable most of the time she mentioned how sexy he was; though she supposed that could be more to do with him wanting to be liked for himself rather than his looks, much in the same way she wanted people to like her not just her breasts. 

Steve was the genuine thing, a real hero who stood for all things good and American. Steve Rogers deserved the best Lady in the world. Darcy was not a Lady. Still, instead of moping about it, she decided to suck it up, it wasn't the first time she had had a crush that wasn't requited and she had promised herself a long time ago, that she wouldn’t change who she was for a guy. Darcy was going to be Steve's wingman and find him the perfect woman instead.

Over the next week Darcy made a list of qualities that she needed to look for, then she started looking. Everywhere. Literally everywhere she went she found herself asking women more questions about their personal lives than she asked the people she worked with every day. She felt weird but it got easier. Eventually she hit gold. 

Eve Jones. Twenty-three year old waitress, pretty, working while studying nights at a community college. She worked an impossible amount of hours to cover her school fees and also help her mum pay for their apartment. The real frosting on the cake, was the fact that she brought out leftovers from the diner every day and gave them to homeless people on the way home. She was perfect. 

Darcy made sure to visit the diner several times over the next month or so to make sure of her choice, before deciding it was time to bring Steve into the equation. That day she promised herself that she would ask him about it. 

Which is what distracted her for most of her training session with Natasha. The past few months had definitely improved Darcy's fitness and also her figure, she didn't have a Natasha figure but her thighs while still on the larger side, were now more toned than they had been in years. Her stomach was slightly more toned but not as much as she'd like and her ass was certainly not toned either but the Russian had assured her, that it took longer than a few months to change you figure and that she looked fantastic as she was. Now that she had decided to set Steve up with someone Darcy actually considered making a move on Clint or Natasha. Both of them were good looking and single, neither wanted anything serious with anyone and she knew for a fact, that they had scratched an itch or two for each other often enough. It had been a while for Darcy, a night of sex sounded pretty appealing about now, even if it wasn’t from a certain super soldier.

"Ouch," she cringed, gasping for breath as her back hit the mat.

"You aren't paying any attention at all." The red head's cold voice came from above her.

"I was distracted." She sighed, sitting up. 

"No shit." 

"Alright, give me like five or ten minutes and I'll sort my head out." Darcy said, climbing to her feet and heading for her water bottle. She made her way over to Steve, who was always in the gym around this time. She didn't know if that was just because he spent so much time in the gym or if he enjoyed the company of others being here when he did. 

"Hey," he greeted, pausing his weight lifts for a moment to speak to her.

"Hi," she grinned, "So, I have a question." He nodded for her to continue, taking a long swig of his own water. "I have a day off tomorrow and I figured that it was time you got caught up on other important stuff from the last few decades if you're interested."

"Um...I don't have any plans." He replied uncertainly.

"Great, I'm thinking we go shopping for some essential books, dvds and cds, grab lunch and then head back here to start watching and listening." She suggested. "Oh we can go to this diner I go to, the waitress there is lovely, you'll love her."

"Um...sounds great." He nodded.

"Great so, tomorrow then." She grinned, heading back towards Natasha, who did not look impressed.

"You are an idiot." The older woman muttered.


	5. Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK so this chapter takes a slightly Darcy/Natasha turn but I promise the overall story is still going to be Darcy/Steve once they wake up and smell the roses

Things hadn't gone quite so well. Or at least not as well as she had planned. Eve was perfect. Steve liked her. So why didn't he seem more into her?

Darcy and Steve had started having a regular hangout on a Saturday. They mainly watched movies but sometimes went to museums and things too. Sometimes they went to the diner for lunch, sometimes they had take out and sometimes they even cooked. 

So far she had only managed to convince Steve to go out with Eve once. It didn’t make sense. They were both attractive people inside and out. They were a perfect match. Why wasn’t Steve making another move?

“Soooo…” she mused, tossing a piece of popcorn into her mouth and missing. “When are you and Eve going on a second date?”

“I’m not sure the first time we went out was a date.” He frowned. “We just hung out.”

“Yeah, when you do that with a pretty girl that’s a date.” She nodded, digging around in her top for her lost piece of popcorn. She looked up to find him frowning at her. “What?” He waved between him and her. “Words Steve, use words.”

“You’re a pretty girl.” He said. 

“I…urm…” Darcy felt her face heat up as a flush covered her cheeks.

“You’re a pretty girl, Darcy.” He said again. 

“Shut up.” She laughed kicking his legs with her bare feet. “Where was the smooth talk before? You can never talk to girls, you never manage compliments without stuttering.”

“You’re different.” He shrugged. Darcy felt the previous fuzzy feelings vanish in an instant. Darcy didn’t count as one of the girls. He had just confirmed her as in the friendzone. She had suspected it of course but it still stung to have it confirmed.

“Anyway, Eve is pretty and you seemed to get on. Not talking to a girl after going out with her is considered rude in this decade you know?” she told him, making sure to keep her eyes on the screen.

“If I talk to her will you stop asking?” he asked.

“Yup,” she grinned. “Well…probably.”

“Fine, I’ll talk to her.” He huffed, taking a handful of popcorn for himself and focusing back on the movie.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The following week Darcy avoided Steve Rogers like the plague. She felt like an idiot for acting that way but knowing for certain that Steve pretty much considered her one of the guys still sucked. She wanted to be mature and be cool with it, she really tried to but to do that she needed to take the time to suck it up and get over it.

Natasha wouldn’t let her. 

Darcy had been just about to dig into a pack of cookies when the spy had found her. She was hauled to her feet and dragged out of the room before she could even form a coherent protest. The worst part was that Natasha binned the cookies.

“Hey, I haven’t been training you for you to sit on your ass and eat cookies just because you’re a moron.” She had said.

“I wasn’t going to eat the whole packet!” Darcy protested, finding herself being dragged to the gym.

“Until you make up for the sessions you missed, you won’t be having a single cookie.” The red head said, folding her arms across her chest and waiting for Darcy to go and change.

“Fine, sheesh.” She sighed, heading to the changing rooms and changing into her workout clothes, grateful that she now had her own clothes here rather than borrowing ones that were too small.

Natasha was a hard task master, after warm up Darcy found herself really regretting missing the last few days of training. 

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re kind of mean?” she asked, rubbing her side to soothe the ache.

“Of course.” 

“Well, you are.” Darcy said firmly.

“It get the job done.” The older woman shrugged. “Feel better now?”

“For the record, I hate that the answer to that is yes.” She mumbled, taking the water offered to her. “Who knew that being beaten up is good for stress relief?”

“You’re not stressed, you’re sulking.” Natasha corrected. “You have two choices on that front, do something about it or suck it up and get over it.”

“Harsh.” She sighed. “There’s nothing I can do, Steve doesn’t think of me that way, he said so.” Natasha actually looked surprised at that.

“Then that’s his problem. You do not let yourself go over a man. You suck it up and move on.” The Black Widow said firmly. 

“Yeah well, moving takes a while so forgive me if I’m not instantly OK with it.” Darcy muttered. “What to go out drinking later? I’m feeling the need to get laid and it’d be good to have your lie detection super power thing going on to make sure I don’t end up hooking up with an axe murder of something.”

“You know I don’t actually have a lie detecting super power right?” the woman asked. “I just have good observation skills and intuition.”

“Meh, the way I said it sounded cooler.” Darcy waved off. 

“You know that doing the job yourself is usually quicker.” Darcy spat her water back into the bottle in surprise at the woman’s words. She looked up and found that the woman did actually look serious.

“You can’t kiss yourself.” She pointed out. “Sometimes a hot make-out session is just what the doctor ordered.”

“Which doctor?” 

“None of the ones living in this tower!” Darcy said quickly. “I mean, yeah some of them are hot but just no!”

“I find that odd, you come across as the kind of person who doesn’t mind casual sex with friends.” Natasha shrugged.

“I don’t but there’s also friends that you can’t do that with because it’d be too weird!” she protested.

“Offer stands.” The woman shrugged, heading to the changing rooms. Darcy blinked in shock for a moment before replaying the words in her head.

“Wait, what?” she called, leaping to her feet.


	6. Help Wanted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy and Steve both seek out help. Not going to lie Darcy gets more fun out of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will apologise now to any Natasha fans that the Darcy/Natasha scene isn't greatly detailed or long, not because I'm not into that because have you seen those ladies I would totally lez it up with either or both of them but because this is mainly a Darcy/Steve story and so many of the readers don't really want to read about other pairings. Anyway sorry, not sorry, the next chapter involves more Darcy and Steve interaction.

The only time Darcy had ever done more than kiss a woman was in college. Kate had been in two of her elective classes, the two had been very similar in personality which meant they had flirted from day one. Two weeks after meeting they went out drinking and woke up the naked morning naked after probably the best sex Darcy had ever had. Up until then she had never managed to reach orgasm with a partner and only half of her sexual partners had managed it since. With Kate orgasms were multiple and only one guy that she had been with had ever managed that since, he had been older...probably a bit too old for anything to have realistically come from the weekend they spent in his apartment. She had been under no illusions of course and wasn't exactly heartbroken that she hadn't seen him since. 

Kissing Natasha was the hottest thing she had done for at least a year. The woman knew exactly what she was doing and did it well. Once Darcy had followed the woman into the changing room she had found herself being thoroughly kissed and dragged towards the showers. They managed to undress eventually, already in the shower, their soaked clothes littered the tiled floor in the cubicle and just outside it. Natasha's body was amazing. Hard toned lines, with a slight softness on top. Not extremely muscular but the kind of lean toned limps that held a deep rooted strength. Darcy enjoyed nibbling at the older woman stomach the most. That stomach...

Between they worked their way through two orgasms each before Darcy leant back against the tiled wall for breath. 

"God that was hot, best friend ever." She laughed. "I needed that."

"Any time. I find orgasms post workout to be extremely relaxing." The red head said, ducking under the water to rinse off. "How long had it been?"

"Since I had sex? Six months, since I had decent sex over a year." Darcy retorted. Natasha smirked at that before wringing her hair out.

"I trust you're not going to want a date or anything after this?" She asked.

"Nah, I'm good." Darcy took her turn to rinse off and followed the woman out of the shower. They were met with Clint coming into the changing room. It wouldn't be the first time Clint Barton had walked into the changing room and found Darcy in just a towel or various other states of dress or undress but this time his eyes were focused on the heap of wet clothes across the floor. 

"Damn, thanks for the invitation Nat." He muttered.

"You weren't here, I was, deal with it." Natasha shrugged, dropping her towel and pulling on a clean dry pair of clothes. 

"Don't suppose there's an encore?" He asked.

"I'm good for like the next week actually, at least." Darcy told him, heading around to her locker which was thankfully not quite so in view of the two spies. 

"Two of the hottest women in the building and I missed it." He huffed. 

"Suck it up Barton!" Darcy called out to him.

"You suck it Lewis!" He laughed back.

"My jaw's already tired, better luck next time." She laughed, glad that things hadn't changed between them.

"You seriously think he could satisfy two women?" Natasha snorted.

"Nah probably not but once he's limp and useless I'll have you." She grinned, walking back over now in her normal clothes. "I'm going for a sandwich since someone threw out my cookies. See ya!"

Clint looked over at the red head and waited until he knew Darcy was out of earshot to speak.

"What happened to Steve?" He asked.

"She said he doesn't think of her that way, that he actually said as much." She frowned. "I've seen the way he looks at her so I doubt that's true."

"Misunderstanding then?" He asked.

"Either that or pushing her away on purpose." The woman mused. "She was moping, she needed to be reminded that she was attractive. When the topic came up, it was an opportunity." 

"Yeah, I bet it was torture for you." He rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, twice." The woman smirked. "Now, I'm going to get a coffee and track down Rogers." 

~*~*~*~

It wasn't until Wednesday that Steve realised that Darcy was avoiding him. At first he had thought that she was just busy but when she managed to disappear whenever he headed in her direction with called out apologies and various excuses, he began to realise that it was just him. Alright, perhaps it was Bruce asking him what he had done to upset Darcy that tipped him off if he was honest about it. 

"I um...nothing, I don't think?" He replied scratching his head. "I'd ask her if I could actually talk to her for more than five seconds..."

"I'm sure it'll work out, you guys seem pretty close." The scientist offered kindly. 

"Yeah, I thought so." Steve agreed, thinking back to the weekend when they had spent about six hours together watching films. "Oh."

"What?" Bruce raised an eyebrow curiously. 

"I might have freaked her out. We were talking about this girl Darcy tried to set me up with-"

"Darcy? Tried to set you up?" He asked looking surprised. 

"Yeah, why?" 

"Nothing, it's just interesting. Carry on." The man shook his head.

"Anyway, I said that it hadn't been a date, that we'd just hung out. She said that when you hang out with a pretty girl its a date." He explained. "I uh...I asked her to elaborate on what that made us. I said she was pretty. Was that wrong? Did that freak her out?"

"I'm fairly certain its never wrong to call a girl pretty." Bruce assured him. "They like to hear that, even sisters or friends. I'm pretty sure there's just been a slight...miscommunication between you two. I'm sure it'll work itself out."

"I hope so, we usually hang out every Saturday and she hasn't cancelled yet...I don't want it to be weird." He sighed.

"Not cancelling is a good sign." Bruce said pointedly. He paused and looked uncertain for a moment and Steve could tell he was wondering whether he should say something. "And the girl? The other girl, I mean, are you dating her?"

"No, not as far as I'm aware. We hung out once. I met her through Darcy a couple of times when we went to the diner, we barely know one another." Steve frowned. "Is that relevant?"

"Maybe."


	7. What Just Happened

Darcy answered the insistent knocking at the door reluctantly that Saturday morning. She had successfully avoided Steve all week and had half hoped that he wouldn't seek her out today. Although as she opened the door to his nervous face, she had to admit she had missed him.

"It's only 9am Steve, we never do anything this early." She groaned, leaning against the door frame and cursing the fact that this was hardly going to make her more attractive in his eyes. Her hair was a total mess and she was currently wearing batman pyjamas and the remains of yesterday’s make up. 

"I...um..." Steve swallowed, glancing down at Darcy's exposed legs in her rather short shorts. "I wanted to catch you before you conveniently had somewhere to be."

"Alright, I deserved that." She sighed, feeling rather childish for avoiding him with giving him a reason. "But you're the one that gets to wait around while I dig around my bedroom floor for clothes."

"Darcy wait, if I did anything to make things weird between us, I didn't mean to." He said, catching her wrist as she turned back towards her room. "You're important to me, you know that right?"

"I'm fine." She told him, turning and offering him a smile because he was still Steve. He was still the kindest, sweetest guy on the planet, who wouldn’t hurt a fly unless he had no other choice. "I've just been feeling a bit off this week, I didn't want you to worry." Darcy couldn't look at him while she said it. She had just lied to Captain America! She was going to hell for this but she didn't want to make things worse by explaining the truth. His friendship was important to her, he was important to her, she could get over the rest of it. 

"Are you feeling better now?" He asked, his hand reaching for her face as if seeking any trace of illness. "Did you want to wait here and I'll go get us some snacks? We can just hang out indoors today." 

"Sounds great." She agreed. "Why don't you go get the snacks and I'll get dressed and queue up something to watch on the TV?"

"Alright, I'll be right back." He told her. "Any preferences?"

"You know what I like." She shrugged watching him go. She made her way into her bedroom, finding the closest pair of reasonably clean jeans and a sweater, she got herself cleaned up and dressed. When she returned to the living area, she found herself staring at the couch. This time last week they had been sat there and he had called her pretty. The thought that he thought she was pretty made her smile fondly, even if the conversation that followed had dashed any hopes of ever dating Steve Rogers. 

 

~*~*~*~

"Hey Steve, you're here earlier than usual." The blonde greeted him with a smile. "No Darcy?"

"She's back at home, her home I mean, waiting for me. I mean waiting for the food, not me, waited for me to bring food." He stopped talking when Eve began to laugh at him.

"You are too adorable for words." She beamed at him. "What can I get you today?"

"She's not been feeling great, so I thought some of the pastries, comfort food." He replied, ducking his head in embarrassment. 

"Is she sick?" Eve looked concerned. "If she's sick, does she need to watch what she's eating at all in case it aggravates her stomach?"

"I'm not really sure if she's sick or how sick...I'm not really sure of much to be honest." He admitted. "I'm not good at this."

"You're doing fine, Darcy knows exactly what you're like and she's still with you, why so worried? Has she never been sick before?" She asked, boxing up a few of the delicious smelling pastries from the counter. "Taking care of someone when they're sick is a lot easier than you'd think, even just knowing someone is trying to help can make you feel a whole lot better."

"I'm not with Darcy." He frowned. 

"Then you're an idiot." She chided softly.

"It's not like that between her and I, we just-"

"It is most certainly like that between you two, you here me?" The petite woman said firmly. "Anyone with eyes can she you two eying each other like the rest of the world doesn't exist. That girl is crazy about you and don't you try to tell me that you're not interested in her."

"She is?" Steve blinked in surprise. 

"Blind leading the blind I tell you." The blonde chuckled. "Take these and get back to her mister. A word of advice Steve, just kiss the girl."

"But what if I-"

"Kiss the girl, Steve." 

Of course things never go entirely as planned. His phone started going off before he'd even made it around the corner. 

"Stark." He greeted, answering it.

"Suit up Cap, we've got trouble, we are go in twenty." Tony told him.

"This is not my week." He sighed, "I'll be there." He hung up the phone and glanced at the box in his hand. It would be a shame to waste them, he could just drop them off to Darcy quickly before heading back to the tower. 

 

~*~*~*~

 

When Darcy opened the door for the second time that morning, she was dressed. It did however only take her a heartbeat of two to realise that it was Captain America now stood in her building, not Steve.

"Duty calls?" She asked, as he placed the box on the coffee table.

"Duty calls, sorry." He nodded. "The jet is waiting, which means we're heading out of town."

"It's cool Steve, I know the drill." She told him. "But all of you be careful, promise?"

"We're always careful." 

"That's a lie! You're Captain America, you're not allowed to lie!" Darcy gaped, prodding him in the chest. "You're never careful, you would so get yourself killed if it saved everyone else and the others are just as bad."

"Part of the job." He admitted.

"Well don't die or I'll kill you!" She said firmly, poking him again, damn his chest was solid...probably hurt her finger more than him.

On an impulse not unlike one he had felt many years ago, Steve found himself grabbing Darcy's arms and pulling her to him. 

Darcy's eyebrows shot up in surprise, Captain America was kissing her. Holy shit, Captain America was kissing her and she wasn't kissing him back! She fought through her shock to rectify that issue, her lips relaxing against his, letting him kiss her until all too soon, he stopped. He let go of her completely and headed for the door.

"I'll be back!" He called, disappearing from sight. 

"What the hell just happened?!" She found herself asked out loud in her empty apartment.


	8. Just As You Are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the unfinished version of this "last chapter" I will be redoing it with added smut at some point but I figured I'd pop this here for the moment and replace it with the smutty version later when I get around to finishing it.

Darcy made her way to Stark tower only moments after Steve left. He must have literally ran the entire way there because the jet was gone when she arrived. She made her way to the team's communal kitchen, Dr Banner and Erik were there mid conversation. They paused as she stopped abruptly in the doorway.

"Darcy, are you alright?" Erik asked, taking in her flustered appearance. 

"Did Thor go too?" She asked.

"Yeah, a few minutes ago." He nodded.

"Is it bad?" 

"I wouldn't worry, if it was really bad they'd have taken me." Bruce murmured. 

"That's how you guys measure the danger level of a mission?" She asked gaping at him in horror. He offered her a sheepish shrug in return.

“Is something wrong Darcy?” Erik asked.

“Damn right there is.” She muttered. “You wait until he gets back; he is so getting a piece of my mind.”

“Thor?” 

“Steve.” Darcy corrected him and taking a seat at the counter with them.

~*~*~*~

Four hours later…

"OK, which one of us pissed off Lewis?" Tony asked, as they landed to see Darcy storming her way out of the doors at the top of the tower.

"If I had to guess I'd vote you." Barton smirked. "It's usually you."

"I haven't spoken to her in days, wasn't me." He countered defensively, before looking back into the jet at his other teammates. "Rogers?" 

"Yeah, I guess that was probably me." He sighed, ducking his head in defeat. "This I going to be interesting." Steve stood and made his way out of the now open door to confront the angry looking brunette.

"How did he manage to tick off Darcy?" Tony mused. "They’re like best buddies and isn't being an angel kind of his thing?"

"Lovers spat maybe." Clint shrugged.

"Pfft, Rogers and Lewis? You're kidding right?" The billionaire snorted. "If Cap was going to make a move on that he'd have said or done something by now." The two men paused as they observed Steve stop slightly sheepishly in front of the young woman.

Darcy punched him in the arm, ignoring the pain it caused her, she did it again.

"You kissed me you ass!" She shouted angrily.

"Or maybe he did." Tony murmured quietly.

"Then you ran off without saying anything! Who does that?!" She demanded, hitting him again. 

"Sorry?" Steve offered, rubbing the spot she kept hitting.

"For which part?" She huffed, crossing her arms in front of her.

"Um...whichever bit you're mad at me for?" He replied uncertainly.

"Aren't you supposed to be testing your kissing on Eve?" She raised her eyebrows and waved her arms at him. Darcy knew that she probably looked insane about now but she was beyond confused.

"She's nice, she's beautiful even but I don't love Eve. I'm not interested in kissing Eve." He explained.

"Of course you're not in love with her yet, you date someone first then you fall in love with them!" She snapped. "She is perfect! Do you have any idea how long it took me to find someone good enough for Captain America? You don't need to be in love with someone to date them or kiss them!"

"I do."

“Seriously?! I went through all the trouble of- wait, what?”

Darcy froze. She vaguely saw Natasha ushering Tony and Clint away and into the tower, before looking back at Steve. No words. She had no words. Was he saying... He couldn't be saying what it sounded like he was saying. She bit her lip, he wouldn't lie to her either though, not about something like this.

"What if I don't want perfect for Captain America? What if I just want someone who likes Steve Rogers?" He asked, stepping a little closer to her. His hands tentatively reached for her, resting on her arms. 

"Oh." She mouthed, he was serious. She mentally kicked herself in an attempt to find some words beyond 'oh'.

"Darcy, if I kiss you again are you going to keep hitting me?" He asked, ducking his head until his mouth hovered just above hers.

"No?" 

"Good." And with that last determined word Darcy found herself being kissed, again. This time she was more prepared, eagerly reaching her arms up to his shoulders. As he pulled away she tightened her grip, refusing to let the kiss end yet. Taking note of her desire to be kissing him, Steve drove his lips against her more forcefully, deepening the kiss into something much more intense than he originally intended. This short, infuriating and warm hearted woman drove him nuts. Finally, he pulled back with a small gasp to catch his breath, finding her face wonderfully flushed also.

“I thought I was different.” She said quietly, remembering their conversation on her couch last week.

“You are different.” He said fondly, his hand sliding down her arm to grip hers and squeeze it gently. “I wouldn’t want you any other way.”

“Shut up.” She blurted, feeling embarrassed.

“Does this mean you would consider going on a date with me?” he asked.

“You couldn’t have asked that question months ago?” she demanded. “Screw dating, we’re skipping a few steps.”

“But I-”

“Come on soldier boy, we’ve got lost time to make up for.” She cut him off, dragging him into the tower. “Move it, your apartment or mine?” 

Steve couldn’t help but let out a laugh. “Oh I get a choice now?” he asked with a grin. “I thought you were in one of your bossy moods where there wasn’t a choice.”

“You think I’m bossy?” she frowned.

“Wouldn’t have you any other way.” He repeated, leaning forward to peck her lips with his. “I love you just the way you are.”

“And yet you couldn’t figure out you loved me until after I had to avoid you while feeling all pathetic for being in love with you.” She muttered, resuming her dragging towards the elevator.

“Say it again.” Steve said with a pleased grin.

“I’m in love with you.” She replied, a flush reappearing on her cheeks. “Whatever, I’m not going all soppy for you. You did just say you like me as I am so…no backsies.”

“As long as you love me I can live with that.” He chuckled as they exited Stark tower hand in hand.


End file.
